Atheist Fag

Poland Investigates Homo Agenda Teletubbies

Posted on May 28th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith Based Bigotry, Homophobia, Religious Wingnuts, Roman Catholic.

Jerry Fartwell might be dead, but his brand of astonishing stupidity and boundless intolerance lives on in modern day Poland, a homophobe’s dream nation.

A Polish government official named Ewa Sowinska has asked psychologists to investigate the Teletubbies based on the fact that known homosexual activist Tinky Winky carries a red purse.

Poland is deeply infested with Catholicism, so intolerance and homophobia are to be expected. Fast action is required before Polish infants begin practicing gay sex acts with their Teletubbies crib toys. With the BBC actively recruiting Polish children to adopt the red purse lifestyle, a return to Communism is no doubt just around the corner. They’re all in it together, everybody knows that. We may have to nuke London.

Technorati Tags: Tinky Winky, Teletubbies, BBC, Poland, Polish Government, homosexual agenda, homosexual propaganda, gay infants, Ewa Sowinska, Catholicism

1 comment.

God Hates Mixed Fibers

Posted on May 22nd, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Comedy, Dumbass Religions, Faith Based Bigotry, Religious Wingnuts.

A Spanish retail clothing chain has been forced to recall a line of men’s suits because idiotic orthodox Jews got very pissy and whiny over the fact that the clothing was made with a combination of linen and wool. Oh no, run away! These wankers believe that their Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy hates mixed fibers. Not content to just refrain from buying such clothing because God Hates Mixed Fibers, these religious imperialists required the clothing chain to completely remove the offending garments from their stores, denying atheists and other less deluded types the opportunity to buy such items as well.

This case clearly illustrates the sort of problems rampant in all 3 of the abysmally stupid Abrahamic religious delusions. Those afflicted with these idiotic beliefs are not content just to avoid wearing clothing that will get them cast into the eternal hell of fires burning oil stolen from Iraq, they feel a compulsion to force everybody to wear clothing they endorse.

If some Jewish people want to belong to idiotic cults with moronic ideas about fictional deities, good for them. They can delude themselves about anything their hearts desire. We support their right to aspire to stupidity and idiocy. But if they don’t mind very much, I’d prefer to decide which sorts of seafood I eat, clothing I wear, and if it is not too much of an inconvenience for them, I might even wish to decide with whom I will and will not have consensual sex. I’ll even trim the corners of my fucking beard, if it’s not too much of a hassle for them.

It’s no wonder God Hates Fundamentalists.

Technorati Tags: God Hates, mixed fibers, crustaceans, barbers, Orthodox, abraham, dumbass religions

2 comments.

Are Mitt Romney and Tom Cruise Secret Gay Lovers?

Posted on May 3rd, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Comedy, Mor[m]ons, Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans.

Mitt Romney recently revealed that his favorite book of all time was the psychotic ravings of L Ron Hubbard in Battlefield Earth, the proto-Bible of the Scientologist cult of which Tom Cruise is a well known member. This furtive admission by would-be warmonger Romney finally allows us to connect certain details of Mitt’s lifestyle choice and that of the famous Mr Cruise.

As Ted Haggard clearly demonstrated for the world last fall, those who protest most vehemently against homosexuals are often the folks with the deepest and darkest closet spaces. It is a well known fact that Tom Cruise has an entire army of attorneys just waiting to sue anyone who suggests he is a bit light in the loafers. And Mitt Romney has been struggling for many years to portray himself as the most viciously and vehemently homophobic of all the Party of Jesus Presidential candidates.

So let us examine the known facts, Tom Cruise poses as an actor in order to distract people from his Scientologist agenda, while Mitt Romney poses as a Mor[m]on so folks won’t guess that he is a follower L Ron Hubbard. One must admit that it is a fairly clever ploy on Romneys part to conceal his membership in one psychotic and abusive cult by claiming to be a member of a somewhat older but more violent death cult.

Many have postulated that Mitt Romney and Tom Cruise are actually secret gay lovers. In order to evaluate this claim, since both well known homophobes can be expected to issue forcefully worded denials, let us examine the facts that are available to the general public.

• Mitt Romney claims to be a lifelong hunter
• Tom Cruise appeared in a movie as a vampire, hunting for victims
• As Governor of Massachusetts, Romney used his bully pulpit to harass gays
• Tom Cruise was constantly bullied in school
• Although Tom Cruise often makes donations to political candidates, he has carefully avoided giving money to Romney
• Romney says he’ll expand our Armed Forces if elected, is he secretly planning to hire Top Gun?

When you add up all of the available evidence, and consider what great efforts Mitt Romney and Tom Cruise have gone to in order to avoid being seen together in public, only one conclusion is possible. Still, we wonder which one is the top?

Technorati Tags: Mitt Romney, Ted Haggard, Tom Cruise, gay lovers, Scientology, L Ron Hubbard, closet cases, homosexuality, gay rights, Battlefield Earth, favorite book, Republican, Party of Jesus

2 comments.

Vatican Spews More Anti-Gay Venom

Posted on April 25th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith Based Bigotry, Homophobia, Priest Rape, Rants, Religious Wingnuts, Roman Catholic, child rape.

Not that anybody is terribly surprised, but the world-leading organization for raping children and spewing hatred at gay people has let loose some more verbal excrement in their typical whining fashion.

The Vatican’s second-highest ranking doctrinal official on Monday forcefully branded homosexual marriage an evil. Won’t somebody think of the children?

In Australia the boy raping hatemongers are said, quite accurately, to be gay bashers.

In the same hateful rant Archbishop Angelo Amato classified abortion as a form of terrorism

The Archbishop did not have anything to say about Bishops, Archbishops, or Cardinals who conspire to protect and shuffle child molesting priests from one parish to another.

Technorati Tags: Vatican, Archbishop Amato, gay marriage, terrorism, abortion

0 comments.

In Iran, It’s OK to Kill if the Victim is Morally Corrupt

Posted on April 19th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Court Cases, Faith Based Bigotry, Religious Wingnuts.

For those Americans who still are so deluded that they want to combine Church and State, here is a clear example of the evil done when governments are based on an Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy.

The Iranian Supreme Court in Tehran has ruled that 6 convicted killers may go free without any penalty because they believed the people they killed were morally corrupt. Yes, it’s really true, in the theocratic hellhole that is modern Iran, if a person wants to kill you they need only claim that they believe you are morally corrupt. If a court later finds that the deceased was not morally corrupt, the killer may be required to pay a cash settlement to the family of the murder victim.

The killings were carried out in the area of Kerman by an Iranian religious hate group named the Basiji Force, sort of an Islamic Focus on the Family.

Among those killed by these 6 pious killers that commit state-sanctioned murder on behalf of their Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy was an engaged couple who had the nerve to walk together in a public place before they were married. Naturally any Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy would want you to kill two people who intend to be married if they walked near each other in public, that is obvious to almost any completely insane religious nutter.

One of the important functions of government is to protect sane people from the actions of insane people. When religious nuts get the keys to City Hall this important function is short circuited, because now we have the insane protecting the public from sanity - by killing those who are not equally insane.

This case clearly highlights the extreme importance of the separation of Church and State. If the two become commingled innocent people will suffer every single time. Science brought us airplanes and skyscrapers, it took religion to bring them together.

Technorati Tags: Islam, Iran, Kerman, Basiji Force, Focus on the Family, Church and State, theocracy

1 comment.

Wyoming Lesbian Couple Gay Bashed by Church

Posted on April 5th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith Based Bigotry, Homophobia, Priest Rape, Religious Wingnuts.

A Wyoming lesbian couple afflicted with Catholicism has been banned from receiving communion by the official decree of the regional business manager (bishop) of the Roman Catholic Altar Boy Rape Church. The pair were legally married in Canada in August 2006 and recently were quoted in a local Wyoming newspaper as supporting equal rights for gay and lesbian couples. Bishop David Ricken issued a direct order to their parish priest, instructing him to refuse the flesh brutally ripped from the carcass of an imaginary dead man-god that was killed so they could be forgiven, Catholics call this form of cannibalism Holy Communion. Leah Vader and Lynne Huskinson sent a letter recently to their Wyoming state legislator decrying a proposed bill that would deny recognition of same-sex marriages. The lawmaker read the letter on the floor of the Wyoming State Legislature.

Speaking the obvious truth, one of the pair that have been condemned to eternal hell fire by the Catholic Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Don’t Be Yourself policy said “You spend half your time defending your gayness to Catholics,” Vader said, “and the other half of your time defending your Catholicism to gays.”

One wonders if priests who rape children are perrmitted to continue receiving wafer thin slices of Jesus meat.

It seems the Catholic Church is willing to tolerate the existence of gay people as long as they continue to ride in the back of the bus and deny they are gay in public. It is OK to be a shameful, evil fag or dyke as long as you are ashamed of it and you die a virgin.

Hopefully these ladies who simply wish for their caring relationship to be treated with dignity and respect will take this opportunity to set themselves free from their religious affliction. The Catholic Church can be relied on to continue brutalizing and demonizing perfectly innocent people, that will not be changing during the lifetime of Papa Nazi Ratzi, and you can take that to the bank.

Technorati Tags: Wyoming, Lesbian couple, Papa Nazi, Bishop David Ricken, communion, cannibalism

0 comments.

Hatemonger for Jesus Claims White House Anti-Gay Mission

Posted on March 28th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith Based Bigotry, Homophobia, Religious Wingnuts, hypocrite evangelists.

A hatemongering Fundamentalist Christian preacher traveled to Latvia for an anti-gay conference, claiming that he was sent by the White House to promote his message of intolerance in the name of an Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy that loves everybody except faggots.

Kenneth Hutcherson, a former professional football player and leader of the Antioch Bible Church for Morons, is now in the Jesus Hates You business with his message of anti-gay bigotry. His Christian hosts in Latvia, the New Generation church, showed their Christian piety and Godly love for others by throwing bags of excrement at gay people gathered for a rally last year. I guess they asked themselves What Would Jesus Throw (WWJT) and confused the answer with what they were full of.

Since it is a well known fact that the current occupant of the White House is a fucking idiot, the folks in Latvia believed Hutcherson when he said he was on a mission from Our Glorious Christian Leader.

A Seattle-based lawyer, Dave Coffman, has asked the FBI to investigate Hutcherson’s claims, saying they breach federal law.

Technorati Tags: Homophobia, Jesus, Hatred, Christians, Latvia, Third World, excrement, gays, lesbians, Kenneth Hutcherson, Dave Coffman, Our Glorious Christian Leader, Bigotry

0 comments.

Nazi Ratzi: Hell Exists, Deny it and You’ll Go to Hell

Posted on March 27th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Rants, Religious Wingnuts, Roman Catholic, hypocrite evangelists.

Former Hitler Youth and chief financial officer of the Holy Roman Boy Rape Church Nazi Ratzinger, who goes by Pope Benedict XVI when he does drag, has declared in a bitterly nasty sermon that if you deny the existence of Hell, you’re going to go to Hell.

In an article on The Scotsman the afficionado of altar boys is described as having been furious, and unleashing a bitter attack on the terrible sinners who just don’t talk about hell enough. It seems the old guy in a dress threw a real hissy fit. Joe the Rat was giving a sermon at an ordinary parish church in Rome, and the altar boys on the stage with him were just gorgeous in their training dresses.

Frank Zappa once famously commented on this subject, saying “There is no Hell, there is only France.” Frank had been to France too.

Italian fashion designers and drag queens are very impressed with the high quality gold embroidered threads that Nazi Ratzi has been flaunting in public lately. With his designer shoes, color coordinated magic staff (it looks just like a broom handle) the fag bashing rich guy cuts quite a figure in public. When not busy bashing fags Nazi Ratzi likes to quote the Book of John “let he who is without sin to cast the first stone”. Then he usually gets right back to work campaigning against that gol darn homo agenda.

So if you don’t believe in Hell, you’re going to Hell. And we all know where fags are going. But what about fags that don’t believe in Hell and don’t like super wealthy former Nazis that wear dresses while gay bashing?

Technorati Tags: Ratzinger, Catholic Church, Nazi, Hitler Youth, homo agenda, Hell, Frank Zappa, France, gay bashing, Pope, Benedict XVI, Rome, Sermon

0 comments.

“Elton John Will Make You Gay” Idiot Tobago Deacon

Posted on March 17th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Rants, Religious Wingnuts, hypocrite evangelists.

The archdeacon of the Caribbean nation Republic of Trinidad and Tobago wants to ban Sir Elton John from a local jazz festival for fear that he’ll tempt locals into becoming gay. John is scheduled to headline Tobago’s Plymouth Jazz Festival in April, but the country’s Archdeacon Philip Isaac told a Jamaican newspaper, “His visit to the island can open the country to be tempted towards pursuing his lifestyle.” Run away!

Okay, Diana Ross is also scheduled to appear, so if you catch both acts you might end up as a gay black woman with a fabulous voice.

To come up with a story like this, we believe that the Archdeacon combined stupidity, bigotry, and open hostility to reality - it is no wonder he is a religious leader.

Technorati Tags: Gay menace, Elton John, Trinidad and Tobago, Archdeacon Philip Isaac, bigotry, religion, stupidity, faith

0 comments.

Pressure Builds on Alberto “Torture Time” Gonzales

Posted on March 12th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans.

As a White House lawyer he produced preposterous legal “opinions” that Our Glorious Christian Leader was not subject to the laws of mortal humans. He offered observations about how quaint the Geneva Conventions were, the same Geneva Conventions that have been trampled into the dirt by Our Glorious Christian Leader. He declared that torure was not really torture unless Our Glorious Christian Leader decided to call it torture. He was an enabler for the Moron in Chief.

As his reward, Our Glorious Christian Leader made him US Attorney General, where he continued his efforts to shred and discard the US Constitution. When the US Congress was selling us all down the river with the perfectly misnamed Patriot Act, he made smarmy and obviously insincere promises to act like a grown up and play by the rules.

But as a faithful member of the Party of Jesus, he began raping the law and oppressing the people as soon as he got into office. After promising the FBI would not abuse their new supra-constitutional powers, they began right away with sooper-seekrit spying activity on thousands of ordinary Americans. And the Patriot Act even made it illegal to tell an innocent citizen that Big Brother was watching.

When US Attorneys in various districts failed to prosecute sufficient numbers of Demoncrats, “Torture Time” had them fired. But now, somehow, the blinders seem to have failed to function, and the Congress is beginning to react to a pattern of years of lawless and sinister behavior. Maybe our Congress will work up the courage to just say NO to faux lawyers for Jesus. Or maybe not.

Technorati Tags: Alberto Gonzales, Torture Time, Patriot Act, quaint, US Constitution, Party of Jesus, Our Glorious Christian Leader

0 comments.

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