Atheist Fag

Insane Pat Robertson Uses Bible to Predict Nukular War

Posted on October 3rd, 2008 by Fagnit.
Categories: Christian Candy, Comedy, Dumbass Religions, Lying Bastards, Religious Fraud, Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans, hypocrite evangelists.

Professional Jeebus nutter and assassination afficionado Pat Robertson continues his march into insanity today with a prediction that Israel will conduct a nukular attack on Iran between our election and inauguration days, that Russia will jump into the war, and maybe even a few US cities will be nuked. The insane lover of illegal gun smuggling and proponent of faith-based assassinations claims that his study of Bible fairy tales is the source for his psychic psychotic vision.

Robertson said his opinion was that Israel would bomb Iranian nuclear sites between Nov. 4 and the inauguration of the United States’ new president.

Robertson tied his warning to biblical prophecy. His letter, which starts out describing his concerns about Russian aggression in Georgia, predicted that Russia would also enter the war, though the United States wouldn’t.

(link)

Technorati Tags: Jeebus, Pat Robertson, nukular, prophecy, nukular war, Israel, Iran, Russia, Bible, biblical

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Jeebus Nutter Blames Teh Gayz for Wall Street Crisis

Posted on October 1st, 2008 by Ungodly.
Categories: Comedy, Dumbass Religions, Faith Based Bigotry, Homophobia, Lying Bastards, Religious Fraud, Religious Wingnuts, Sanctity of Bigotry, Stoopit Religions.

A batshit crazy Christian blogger employed by the Christian Civic League of Maine has posted a blog entry claiming that Teh Gayz are responsible for the financial crisis on Wall Street. Usually there has to be at least a half dozen dead bodies laying around before Fundamentalist wingnuts and their Republican stooges begin blaming Teh Gayz. Perhaps Mike Heath was feeling generous, or maybe he just wanted to get his name on the Weird News page.

We will not pollute our MySQL database with a link to this cretins blog post, but it has been discussed at a site we do respect, Pam’s House Blend.

Christian Civil League of Maine Executive Director Michael Heath writes that the financial crisis facing Wall Street is a symptom of America’s sinful sexual culture, including the acceptance of gay unions.

Our crisis is a symptom, not the cause, I am not saying I know whether this financial crisis is God’s judgment or not. It is not for me to know that definitively.

It seems there may be quite a few things that Mr Heath does not know, most important is that his Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy does not even exist. Also there is the fact that Teh Gayz are going to cause his roof to leak, his car to stall, and even ridicule all of the stupid things he says.

And let this be a lesson to Mr Heath never to underestimate the powers of the Homo Agenda!

Technorati Tags: Homo agenda, homosexual agenda, right wingnut, wacko fundie, Christian Civic League of Maine, Mike Heath, Fundamentalist lies, homophobia, irrational fear, irrational loathing, teh gayz

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Church and State, Greed and Hate

Posted on August 22nd, 2008 by Ungodly.
Categories: Dumbass Religions, Faith-Based Hypocrisy, Our Glorious Christian Leader, Religious Fraud, Stoopit Religions, editorials, hypocrite evangelists.

A majority of US citizens, including an increasing number of Republicans and conservatives, have expressed their desire to keep religion out of politics. If ever a survey brought music to our ears, this is the musical one.

Perhaps it is the 8 year reign of our compulsive liar war criminal Glorious Christian Leader that has opened the eyes of the American people. Perhaps they are tired of hypocritical Fundamentalists spreading hatred and division as if it were holiness and justice.

Maybe the good citizens of this nation remember how gung ho all of the Christian leaders were for our war of imperialist aggression based on a pack of lies about Iraq.

Certainly whenever a government is considering doing something evil, like endorsing slavery, promoting bigotry, or legislating homophobia; religion is right there cheering on the hatred.

In a 63-page report out today the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life found that 50 percent of conservatives now believe that churches and other houses of worship should stay out of politics. Four years ago, only 30 percent agreed. Across the entire political spectrum, 52 percent of voters said churches should keep out of politics. Forty-five percent said they should express their views.

Whatever the hard earned lessons that are turning back the tide of Jeebus-brand theocracy in America, we cheer this happy trend on. Congratulations to our fellow Americans, let’s hear it for separation of church and state. The people in Iran should be so lucky.

(story)

Technorati Tags: church and state, greed and hate, separation of church and state, Pew report, religion and politics

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Spanish Woman Poses Nude To Embarrass Mean Uncle Cardinal

Posted on May 6th, 2008 by Fagnit.
Categories: Christian Candy, Comedy, Dumbass Religions, Faith Based Bigotry, Faith-Based Hypocrisy, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Homophobia, Lying Bastards, Religious Fraud, Religious Wingnuts, Roman Catholic, Stoopit Religions, Uncategorized.

A Spanish mother of two, whose uncle is a neo-fascist Catholic Cardinal pig and friend of the Rat in a Hat, was slighted when her uncle ignored the deaths of both of her parents, refusing to attend their funerals and even offering a bald faced lie as an excuse. Perhaps the parents were not hate-mongering homophobic liars, and Cardinal Antonio María Rouco Varela did not like them for thinking independent thoughts. So she did a photoshoot for a Spanish soft porn magazine, Interviú, just to piss off Uncle Asshole. Ha ha!

Magdalena Rouco Hernández stripped off to embarrass her uncle, who is head of the Spanish Episcopal Conference and also a friend of Pope Benedict XVI [ed: Rat in a Hat].

The mother-of-two posed topless on eight pages of Interviú magazine, whose curious formula consists of generous helpings of female flesh combined with serious investigations.

The 27-year-old, who went to mass every day as a girl, said she chose to do the photoshoot to expose her uncle’s “hypocrisy” following her father’s death. “My uncle never tires of repeating that the family is sacred and that you have to respect it. But then he does not respect it and abandons his own,” she said.

“When my father died, [Rouco] did not come to the funeral, didn’t send flowers or tell my mother of his sorrow. He told us he had a meeting with Pope John Paul II, but it was not true.

Who has Family Values? Is it the daughter who loved her parents dearly and later posed in a risque fashion, or is it the Family Values Cardinal who does not even give a shit about his own family.

The Cardinal loves to spread lies and hatred, he is after all a Catholic Cardinal, so he says idiotic things like “gay marriage is the worst disaster in 200 years“. No doubt because of the millions of deaths in Spain since gay marriage became legal. Altar boys know that the more a priest complains about homosexuals, the more dresses he has in his closet. I bet the Spanish altar boys don’t ever let him get them alone in a corner.

One thing I really do admire very much about Spanish culture is that they do not tolerate fascist pig religious leaders messing with their government. They have learned from experience.

Technorati Tags: Cardinal Antonio María Rouco Varela, Magdalena Rouco Hernández, soft porn, Pope Benedict XVI, Rat in a Hat, Spanish Episcopal Conference, photoshoot, Interviú magazine

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Pope Expresses Deep Shame Over Child Molestations by Priests

Posted on April 15th, 2008 by Fagnit.
Categories: Court Cases, Dumbass Religions, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Priest Rape, Religious Fraud, Roman Catholic, child rape.

The Rat in a Hat, spiritual leader of over 1 billion deeply delusional people, has said a few things with which we are happy to agree. This came as a surprise, but a pleasant one.

Speaking with reporters while airborne on Pope 1 enroute to the US, the world’s wealthiest man who wears a gold lamé dress, said that he was deeply ashamed of the thousands of cases of child sexual abuse perpetrated by his employees in conducting the official business of his corporate state. This shame that he feels is completely justified and realistic, unlike much of what he says.

The Rat in a Hat has every good reason to be ashamed of the history of conspiracy, cover ups, enabling, and white-washing of felony crimes committed by his associates. He is especially entitled to be ashamed of his personal role in ordering the coverups and then later seeking legal immunity for his role. In 2001 then Cardinal Ratzinger, a/k/a God’s Rotweiler, he sent a letter to US bishops ordering them to cover up the crimes of his employees.

So yeah, Ratzi, you do have plenty to apologize for, and maybe some more cash-bleeding court cases to suffer through too. But at least we know that when it came to choosing between protecting the church from the testimony of victims, or protecting children from child molesting priests - you made the choice to protect the Vatican instead of the kids.

Back to today’s interview over the Atlantic, the Rat in a Hat did have the good taste to make it clear that these felon priests were pedophiles, and that this was not the same as being homosexual. Maybe it is the small miracles we should be thankful for, don’t seem to be a lot of big ones.

Technorati Tags: Rat in a Hat, Ratzinger, Child abuse, priest rape, catholic church, coverups, conspiracy, priest roulette, papal visit, his holiness

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Catholic Church Evicting Nuns to Pay for Child Molesting Priests

Posted on October 17th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Court Cases, Dumbass Religions, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Priest Rape, Religious Fraud, child rape.

The Holy Roman Boy Rape Church Regional Profit Center in Los Angeles is cutting costs to protect the cash flow of Nazi Ratzi. In an effort to raise enough money to pay off 660 million dollars in child-rape lawsuits, while still being able to buy $700,000 dresses and Prada shoes for Nazi Ratzi, the LA diocese is evicting perfectly innocent nuns that never raped any children so they can sell the convents where the brides of Christ expected to live out their lives.

Unless you are a War President, money does not grow on trees. So the Church has decided to punish the innocent nuns instead of the wealthy and powerful bishops who actually ran the pedophile rotation rings for decades while collecting big bucks from the naive faithful.

Until these gol darn lawsuits started the Boy Rape Church had a pretty good racket going. First they forbid their chump followers use of birth control, insuring a steady flow of virgin children, then they collected the big bucks needed to support their child molesting priests in the luxurious style they prefer. Now that they have been caught in the act several thousand times, the church wants more money from the chumps to pay for the crimes the chumps unwittingly financed in the first place.

And since the chumps are beginning to develop some resistance to the constant fleecing by the Boy Rape group, and the number of chumps is steadily declining, the world’s wealthiest Nation-state-religion is being forced to cannibalize itself in order to meet their court-imposed debts.

One must feel sorry for the nuns in this case, many of whom never did anything worse to a child than rapping them across the knuckles with a ruler, or calling them a brazen hussy. But as for the operators of the pedophile ring, Fuq Em!

Technorati Tags: Roman Catholic, pedophile ring, Los Angeles Archdiocese, child rape, nuns, eviction, lawsuits, Holy Roman Boy Rape Church

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Orange County RC Bishop Faces Jail for Contempt of Court

Posted on October 11th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Court Cases, Dumbass Religions, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Lying Bastards, Priest Rape, Religious Fraud, Roman Catholic, child rape.

In Southern California, Orange County Roman Catholic Boy Rape Church Bishop Tod Brown may be the next bitch sharing a cell with a 400 pound Latino gangster who was abused by a priest as a child.

As the recent court case against the world’s largest child molesting organization was winding down, a “high ranking church official” broke down in tears, and was apparently on the verge of spilling the beans when Bishop Brown sent him safely outside the jurisdiction of US courts for “treatment” in Canada. This pissed off Orange County Superior Court Judge Gail Andler, and the contempt of court charges followed.

Interesting to note is that in this case the Catholic Church was protecting a child molester that was not an actual priest, no doubt this explains the fact that in this case the child victims were girls and not boys. Without the formal training provided in a Catholic seminary, the teacher and child molester protected by the Church in this case had not been trained in boy rape techniques.

Brown sent Msgr. John Urell, the chief cover up artist for sex abuse allegations in the diocese, to a treatment facility in Canada so that the Monsignor, who was inexplicably overcome with what seemed like real remorse not directly related to a multi-million dollar lawsuit, would not divulge the dirty secrets of the child rape coverup policies designed orginally to protect the financial interests of the world’s largest religio-political-financial empire.

I say lock up the virgin mother fucking Bishop for a few decades and let it serve as a warning to the child rape group. This is not Rome, and crimes against humanity committed by the Church are no longer ignored by the courts in this country. If the bishops, archbishops, and cardinals of the US boy rape church are not willing to abide by the laws of this country they can either go back to Rome and play Hide The Altar Boy with Nazi Ratzi, or they can enjoy the interior decorations of some American prisons and play cell bitch for some big, bulky murderers.

Technorati Tags: Tod Brown, child rape, Catholic Church, conspiracy to obstruct justice, Orange County, Judge Gail Andler, contempt of court

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RC Archbishop Claims European Condoms are Laced with HIV

Posted on September 27th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Dumbass Religions, Faith-based Sighince, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Lying Bastards, Religious Fraud, Roman Catholic, Sighintifik Resurch, editorials.

The Holy Roman Child Rape Church Bishop of Mozambique has claimed that condoms shipped to Africa from European nations have been intentionally laced with the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) in a racist plot to kill Africans.

Archbishop Francisco Chimoio, a direct report employee of Nazi Ratzi, repeated this death-promoting lie directly to a Reuters reporter. If this intentional deceit by a mother fucking robber baron is not a crime against humanity, I’d like to know how it is not.

By using condoms, persons having sex greatly reduce the risk of transmitting HIV, the virus that even the Catholic Church admits causes AIDS. When a mother fucking son of a bitch like this lying toe rag tells this kind of a carefully calculated malicious lie people that are misguided enough to listen to this scumbag increase the risk that they and the people they love will die.

We have a message for Archbishop Francisco Chimoio, Up against the wall, motherfucker.

Technorati Tags: Archbishop Francisco Chimoio, child rape, Catholic Church, child molesters, HIV, AIDS, bald faced lie, crimes against humanity, Nazi Ratzi, condoms, Europe, Africa, conspiracy to commit murder

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Mexican Cardinal Knew Priest Was Child Molester

Posted on September 13th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Court Cases, Dumbass Religions, Faith-Based Hypocrisy, Holy Roman Child Rape Church, Priest Rape, Religious Fraud, Roman Catholic, child rape, hypocrite evangelists.

The group Survivors Network of Those Abused by Priests has released copies of court documents containing written correspondence between Mexico City Cardinal Norberto Rivera and Los Angeles Cardinal Roger Mahony. These documents, according to SNAP, indicate that the head of the Mexican Catholic Regional Profit Center (diocese) knowingly transferred a child-molesting priest to Los Angeles to let the public furor in Mexico die down, protecting the all important income stream from scandal.

Additional documents indicate that Nicolas Aguilar had been arrested for child rape in Mexico, and because that nation is deeply afflicted with Catholicism and other types of deceit - naturally the creep was not put in jail. Instead he was promoted to America.

Later, when American parents had the brazen gall to complain about their children being raped, Cardinal Mahony sent the serial child molester back to Mexico, where he still roams the hills to this day seeking virgin children to rape and casting Catholic magic spells.

So this high ranking Cardinal, a position roughly analogous to a member of the board of directors in a corporation that does not conspire to rape children, was perfectly well aware that Rev. Nicolas Aguilar was a child molester, but instead of taking away his book of magic spells he just sent the bastard to Los Angeles for some fresh Mexican-American kiddies to rape. These Cardinals are so amazingly evil they make a Republican Senator look good.

SNAP also released a 1986 Mexican police report in which witnesses alleged the suspect spent the night with young boys while working as a priest in the central state of Puebla.

It is a new world that we live in today, one in which the Catholic Church is no longer able to conspire to protect criminals at the expense of innocent children without having to pay consequences for their criminal conspiracies.

Cardinals, Archbishops and Bishops are now forced to choose between protecting the cash flow generated by each of their child molesting employees, or turning in their felons right away in order to protect the Nazi Ratzi Prada Shoe Fund from multi-million dollar lawsuits when their criminal conspiracies are revealed. The only way to force the Holy Roman Child Rape Church to consider the well being of the children they afflict with their idiotic fairy tales is to threaten the one thing the corporation really cares about: their enormous financial and political empire. Money talks. Cardinals, Archbishops and Bishops have a noticeable increase in their attention span when being told about child-raping priests if there is a downside that involves hundreds of millions of dollars in punitive damages. They even seem to care about the children once the jackpot gets up near two hundred million dollars.

Catholicism: using amazingly stupid ancient fairy tales as smoke and mirrors to conceal the real agenda of raping your children, and expecting you to pay for it. Now is it time to Just Say NO to Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddies?

Technorati Tags: Catholic Church, child molesters, criminal conspiracy, Survivor’s Network of Those Abused by Priests, Cardinal Norberto Rivera, Cardinal Roger Mahony, Nicolas Aguilar, conspiracy to promote child rape, Catholicism

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Republican Comedian Craig Guilty, Not Guilty, Resigning, Not Resigning

Posted on September 6th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Comedy, Court Cases, Faith-Based Hypocrisy, Faith-Based Self Loathing, Homophobia, Religious Fraud, Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans.

Your favorite Republican stand-up comic, US Senator Larry Craig, has issued a denial of his denial that he is not resigning as a non-guilty, guilty pervo Repugnican toilet seat sniffer. He claims that he never inhaled.

“I never had sex with that police officer,” Craig roared to a standing room only crowd at the Boise Improv last night. The Boise Chamber of Commerce reports that hotel rooms and inbound airline seats to the Idaho capital have been hard to get since Craig started his twice nightly standup routine. Tickets on flights routed through Minneapolis are simply impossible to obtain.

Nightly performances take place on a specially constructed set with 4 urinals and 3 adjacent bathroom stalls. The scantily clad Senator gets the crowd roaring early in each set with his patented “I’m not gay, I’ve never been gay” as he stares at his police officer straight man assistant. In his International Male jock strap and leather chaps the 62 year old Senator has become an iconic sex object in the Idaho gay community.

Certain Hollywood insiders close to this column have let slip an unconfirmed rumor that the Senator will be doing a comedy/variety show on Fox TV next season, featuring guests from the Log Cabin Republicans and various Colorado Springs churches and hate groups.

As Craig continues to perform to sold out crowds at the Boise Improv, the favorite part of his act seems to be the way he keeps saying “Guilty”, then turns his head the other way and says “Not Guilty.”

Concerns have been expressed that his nearly nude appearance onstage might weaken Family Values in Idaho, but Craig responded by repeating his trademark line “I’m not gay, I’ve never been gay”. Craig lives just outside Boise in his own Private Idaho.

Technorati Tags: Comedy, Party of Jesus, Larry Craig, Senator Fag, I’m not gay, Family Values, Idaho, guilty, not guilty, resigning, not resigning, toilet sex, US Senate

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