Atheist Fag

Mor[m]on Students Reject Darth Cheney Appearance

Posted on April 3rd, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Mor[m]ons, Repugnicans, Schools.

Perhaps it is actually possible to be a Mor[m]on without being a total wanker nutjob. One does not often hear good news from Utah. Usually any news from Utah is about fag bashing, high school student fag bashing, or some other kind of hatred directed at people that are not afflicted with the Mor[m]on Death Cult and don’t wear magic underwear.

So it was with great delight that we learned of a movement involving a portion of the students and faculty at Brigham Young University urging the school to withdraw an invitation to Darth Cheney to speak at their forthcoming commencement exercise. Critics at the school question whether Cheney sets a good example for graduates, citing his promotion of faulty intelligence before the Iraq war and his role in the CIA leak scandal. This is a nice way of calling Darth Cheney a lying, mother fucking, weapons of mass destruction-using, killer of innocent women and children.

In order to attend Brigham Young a student must swear they will avoid sinful behavior like drinking coffee and wearing shorts. But student Diane Bailey, who is leading a protest Wednesday against Cheney’s visit, said students are not “robotic conservatives.”

Bailey and others are upset by Cheney’s role in promoting faulty intelligence that led the U.S. into the Iraq war. They also cite his proximity to the CIA leak scandal in which his chief of staff, I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, was convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice.

This might be one of the coolest things that has happened in Utah since the Earth was created 6,000 years ago. If Darth Cheney had feelings, there might be a slight risk of them being hurt. We think he should be impeached, and then given a nice relaxing waterboard treatment for each innocent Iraqi citizen that died because of his pack of lies.

Technorati Tags: Darth Cheney, Utah, Brigham Young University, Warner Woodworth, Diane Bailey, Repugnicans, pack of lies, imperialism, war crimes, Dick Cheney, impeachment, waterboard

2 comments.

US Interrogator Says He Tortured For No Reason in Iraq

Posted on April 1st, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith-Based Invasions, Imperialist wars, Repugnicans, faith-based torture.

A patriotic US citizen named Tony Lagouranis has been speaking out about the widespread practice of torturing prisoners of war in Iraq, admitting that he conducted torture sessions with the blessings of Alberto “Torture Time” Gonzales legal opinions that claimed Our Glorious Christian Leader is entitled to authorize torture.

Serving in both the notorious Abu Ghraib prison as well as at Al Asad Airfield, Lagouranis, who is now working as a bouncer at a Chicago bar, says that the practices used by US forces are in fact torture despite the pretend justification from America’s most infamous attorney. Among the techniques he freely admits are used by US Forces are:

• Intimidation with military dogs
• waterboarding, a personal favorite of Darth Cheney
• prolonged stress positions
• shackling prisoners to an upright bed frame attached to a wall
• anal insertion of “thermometers”

Meanwhile, back in the US, Republican-controlled Fox TV was glorifying the illegal and immoral practice of torturing people on the pure propaganda TV series 24.

This pro-torture propagandizing of the American sheeple has not escaped the critical attention of foreign media outlets that are not controlled by US corporations, as is evidenced in Australia, Italy, Malaysia, France, South Africa, and Canada.

Have you heard about this story on Fox News? We did not think so. We first saw the story on UnFox News - it’s not a propaganda arm of the Republican Party.

Technorati Tags: Torture, Iraq, Alberto Gonzales, Abu Ghraib, Tony Lagouranis, Our Glorious Christian Leader, 24, Fox TV

0 comments.

Darth Cheney Claims US House Does Not Support Troops

Posted on March 24th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Faith-Based Invasions, Imperialist wars, Repugnicans.

A majority of the Representatives in the US House have voted to save the lives of at least some of our troops in Iraq by bringing them home so that they will not be killed needlessly by IEDs or snipers. In a pattern consistent with his 7 years of telling lies for huge war profits, Darth Cheney has claimed that this effort shows the House does not support our troops.

Darth would like his corporate warmonger cronies at Halliburton to keep making money hand over fist. To do that, Darth needs to keep our troops there as long as possible. This means that more of them will be killed. Darth claims that his warmongering policies based on greed and a pack of lies are the patriotic way to support our troops. I’ve got a bridge for sale.

If Darth were really patriotic, he’d fly to The Hague and turn himself in for crimes against humanity. That is the only thing the Vice War Criminal can do now to reduce the great harm he has already done to his own country, the people of Iraq, and the whole civilized world to which he has brought so much more terr’ism.

Just to recap the Darth Cheney big lie of the week: bringing our troops home so they do not die equals not supporting our troops; on the other hand keeping our troops there so that more of them die for nothing at all demonstrates support for our troops.

Sorry Darth, you can’t fool all of the people all of the time, just the 35% that are not calling for your impeachment YET. You’re living high on the hog now, Darth, but change rules the universe. You’ll get yours, and many people will be glad you did.

Technorati Tags: Darth Cheney, support our troops, US House, House of Representatives, end war, Halliburton, war profiteer, fuck Darth

0 comments.

Has Darth Cheney Finally Told the Perfect Lie?

Posted on March 12th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Rants, Repugnicans.

His super-sized lies about nukular weapons labs, fictititious uranium sales, and non-existent links between Saddam Hussein and Al Quaeda were main components of the pack of lies used to justify the illegal and immoral invasion of Iraq, but now Darth Cheney may have finally invented the perfect lie.

Not content just to collect his million dollar a year pension from Halliburton, Darth Cheney has enhanced his career with an illegal and immoral war, the promotion of torture, championing illegal detentions, and no doubt many more evil actions we do not yet suspect. But today he may have finally achieved a life-long goal by telling the perfect lie. The US Vice President of Torture has actually said that a “US withdrawal from Iraq would be a disaster for the United States and the entire Middle East.”

No doubt Darth is particularly proud of this lie, as it is the perfect opposite of the truth. It was the US invasion of Iraq justified by his lies that in fact has already caused a disaster for the US and the entire Mideast. It is the amazingly evil actions of Darth Cheney and his band of war profiteering scum that have already created the disaster which any fucking idiot can plainly see already exists.

At times we almost wish the imbecilic religious beliefs of Our Glorious Christian leader actually had some basis in fact, because, if there really was a heaven and a hell everyone currently alive on the entire planet would be able to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, where Darth Cheney was headed next.

At least we can be thankful for the existence of blood clots. Everybody chant with me “Circulate, circulate, circulate”.

Technorati Tags: Darth Cheney, perfect lie, Our Glorious Christian Leader, Iraq, pack of lies

0 comments.

Pressure Builds on Alberto “Torture Time” Gonzales

Posted on March 12th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans.

As a White House lawyer he produced preposterous legal “opinions” that Our Glorious Christian Leader was not subject to the laws of mortal humans. He offered observations about how quaint the Geneva Conventions were, the same Geneva Conventions that have been trampled into the dirt by Our Glorious Christian Leader. He declared that torure was not really torture unless Our Glorious Christian Leader decided to call it torture. He was an enabler for the Moron in Chief.

As his reward, Our Glorious Christian Leader made him US Attorney General, where he continued his efforts to shred and discard the US Constitution. When the US Congress was selling us all down the river with the perfectly misnamed Patriot Act, he made smarmy and obviously insincere promises to act like a grown up and play by the rules.

But as a faithful member of the Party of Jesus, he began raping the law and oppressing the people as soon as he got into office. After promising the FBI would not abuse their new supra-constitutional powers, they began right away with sooper-seekrit spying activity on thousands of ordinary Americans. And the Patriot Act even made it illegal to tell an innocent citizen that Big Brother was watching.

When US Attorneys in various districts failed to prosecute sufficient numbers of Demoncrats, “Torture Time” had them fired. But now, somehow, the blinders seem to have failed to function, and the Congress is beginning to react to a pattern of years of lawless and sinister behavior. Maybe our Congress will work up the courage to just say NO to faux lawyers for Jesus. Or maybe not.

Technorati Tags: Alberto Gonzales, Torture Time, Patriot Act, quaint, US Constitution, Party of Jesus, Our Glorious Christian Leader

0 comments.

Suppose John Edwards Really Was a Faggot

Posted on March 4th, 2007 by Fagnit.
Categories: Religious Wingnuts, Repugnicans.

Ann Coulter must have been very pleased this week when she made international headlines with her hateful and baseless comment about John Edwards. As the leading attack bitch of the Party of Jesus it is her role to keep the faithful focused on the Fundamentalist Agenda by ignoring the serious issues facing our nation and world and focusing on the primary factor that unites the conservative movement in the US, hatred.

Ms. Coulter had nothing to say about the issue of global warming. She knew that the audience before her considered scientists to be a necessary evil that must be ignored whenever possible. She had nothing to say about extraordinary rendition, kidnappings of foreign nationals on their own soil, or conspiracies to deceive hundreds of millions of people into believing a weak foreign power intends to attack us.

Ms. Coulter did not seem to be concerned about health care for the poor and elderly. She did not seem to regret the loss of the thousands who have died and tens of thousands who have been wounded in a war we have already lost. She was only interested in the sexual orientation of a candidate opposing those assembled before her, no doubt because, like everyone else there, she knew that was the most important consideration for Jesus and America.

Her audience seemed perfectly comfortable with the fact that she held and shared her opinion without any basis in fact, they were predominantly Christian, and already well acquainted with belief systems that have no basis in reality.

Indeed, the sheer stupidity and obviously baseless nature of her claim about Mr Edwards made it only more attractive to the crowd. What better way to justify and reinforce their preference for collective dumbthink than to assert an obvious falsehood while simultaneously celebrating their primary unifying characteristic, intolerance.

Sure conservatives love America because there are so many people here that they can hate.

But let’s suppose that John Edwards really was a gay man. We can still hate him for being gay as long as we pretend that he chose to be gay. We can ignore the realities of human sexuality so we can go on hating as if it was justified. We can make jokes about his sexual activities that help us agree by silent implication about the Sanctity of Bigotry. But would he be less competent as a President if his sexual fantasies involved men instead of women?

The charge that Ms. Coulter made in that already famous speech has one thing in common with Ms. Coulter, neither one makes any contribution to human society at all.

Technorati Tags: Ann Coulter, John Edwards, faggot, bigotry, Repugnican, hatred

0 comments.

The Next President of the United States of America?

Posted on December 13th, 2006 by Ungodly.
Categories: Repugnicans.

It is now a well known fact that the people of the US have had it up to here with Our Glorious Christian Leader. In fact the level of disgust and contempt that have been earned by our buffoon mass murderer is so great that it seems almost inevitable that the best person to replace him is going to be the one least like this lying, scheming, moron of a son of a bitch.

I keep thinking Illinois Senator Barack Obama looks very, very promising. In fact he looks like such a decent honest man that I think he is a likely candidate for assassination.

He has begun his run for President, and it seems he is becoming very popular with the Demoncrats on the street.

I find the man very refreshing. I forgive him for being afflicted with religious beliefs because he seems to have no illusion that his religious affliction entitles him to kill anyone, unlike you know who I mean.

I love the fact that his father is a black man and his mother is white. That would really bother the people who should be bothered. But it also makes him a convenient target for the Might Makes Right crowd that currently owns and operates the US military and the US government. And the US courts. And the US press. And the TV networks. So he has a struggle on his hands.

Still, I like the guy. He talks sense and he is INTELLIGENT, which I believe is a desirable quality in a world leader.

Vote early, vote often, vote Obama.

0 comments.

America Decides; Repugnicans Are Repugnant

Posted on November 8th, 2006 by Ungodly.
Categories: Repugnicans.

America has made a clear and unmistakable value judgment about the Party of Jesus. The people of this country have finally realized that the Jesus talk coming from the Repugnican leadership is nothing but a ruse. They have noticed that the Repugnicans have been playing Fundamentalists like fools. They have realized that in the White House, the evil men that have funneled billions of taxpayer dollars into a war that promotes terr’ism have been laughing behind our backs.

Who’s laughing now, George? Did Jesus tell you to lose this election? How many US Soldiers lives did Jesus tell you to waste in Vietraq? How many lawyers can you afford to hire?

While the Repugnicans were making speeches about Freedom Fries in 2003 it was not just to whip up the stupid old fools at the VFW and American Legion halls into a piously xenophobic frenzy. They were also using a technique called redirection so we would not notice the bribes they were taking from military contractors.

Well eventually we did notice. Freedom Fries are gone. Our good and true allies in France were right all along, and the people have finally realized that a cunning and manipulative band of thugs have been running our government, exporting terr’ism, and calling it freedom.

The Party of Jesus party is over George. You can swear on a Bible all you want, but we all realize now that you are a liar and a fool. Your days are numbered. Better start looking into places to hide. I hear that Michael Jackson feels pretty safe from the long arm of the law in Bahrain. And we all know how popular you are in the Arab world because of your tireless efforts to promote freedom. Stay the course, baby.

3 comments.

Donald “Death Star” Rumsfeld to Resign In Shame

Posted on November 8th, 2006 by Ungodly.
Categories: Repugnicans.

The first casualty of the complete and utter rejection of the Vietraq war by the American voting public is one of the co-conspirators that participated in the war crimes of conspiring to propagandize the people and starting this illegal and immoral war of unjustified aggression. He is a warrior of terror, a highly successful promoter of terr’ism. It is because of the Death Star and his co-conspirators in war crimes that terr’ism is on the rise worldwide. His total and blundering incompetence has cost the lives of many brave Americans and far more innocent Iraqis. And it was all for a pack of lies.

Article 6 of the Geneva Conventions makes it an international war crime to engage in a conspiracy to promote an illegal invasion.

Principle Vl
The crimes hereinafter set out are punishable as crimes under international law: (a) Crimes against peace: (i) Planning, preparation, initiation or waging of a war of aggression or a war in violation of international treaties, agreements or assurances; ii) Participation in a common plan or conspiracy for the accomplishment of any of the acts mentioned under (i).

The invasion of Iraq which has served only to increase terrorism was a war crime, as was the conspiracy to begin this war.

George W Bush, Darth Cheney, Donald “Death Star” Rumsfeld, and Co-Conspirator Rice are all part of this illegal conspiracy. They deserve a fair trial and such punishment as may be given by a court of law.

Next we should get rid of Darth Cheney, we certainly do not want him to become President when Our Glorious Christian Leader is removed from the altar of the Party of Jesus.

0 comments.

Massive Slaughter of Repugnican Incumbents Starts in a Few More Hours

Posted on November 6th, 2006 by Ungodly.
Categories: Repugnicans.

We only have to wait a few more hours now before the massive slaughter of incumbent Repugnican war-mongering, influence peddling, Party of Jesus hypocrites begins.

It’s all over now except the dancing in the streets, just be careful not to step in any puddles of Repugnican slime-blood that might be found oozing up from the overloaded sewer system in Washington DC.

Today, in a last ditch attempt to bail out at least one contest, Our Glorious Christian Leader went to Florida to campaign for the anti-gay, closeted gay hypocrite running for Governor (no, he’s not a recently retired evangelical hypocrite, this is a different anti-gay gay Repugnican hypocrite). He’s a loser, and we mean both of them. The anti-gay-gay candidate refused to appear in the same room as Our Glorious Christian Loser. Word has it that Our Glorious Christian Loser and Satan’s pal Karl Rove were mighty pissed with the anti-gay, gay pre-loser.

Our cameras caught Our Glorious Christian Leader trying to take out his frustration on an innocent child that he snatched away from a mother that was suffering from Repugnicanism and did not know any better than to protect her child from a mass-murderer.

Our bet is that Our Glorious Christian Loser won’t be smiling tomorrow.

0 comments.

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